


Cursed Family Photo

by lumbeam



Category: Detroit: Become Human (Video Game)
Genre: Android Revolution (Detroit: Become Human), Domestic Fluff, Family Fluff, Flashbacks, Fluff and Humor, Gen, Human Connor (Detroit: Become Human), Kid Fic, M/M, Parenthood, Photo Shoots, Reverse Big Bang Challenge, awkward family photos, without all the unfortunate historical references!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-31
Updated: 2019-08-31
Packaged: 2020-09-30 09:36:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20444990
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lumbeam/pseuds/lumbeam
Summary: “Whatcha got, Lob?” Hank asked his daughter. His eyes adjusted to what she was holding. It was his old photo album, probably from the late 80s. “Oh my god, where did you find this?” Hank held out his hands to take it from her. He blew off the dust. “No seriously, where did you find this?”“I was looking around in the garage,” Lobelia smiled, her chassis shining in the glow of the muted TV. “Could we go through it?”





	Cursed Family Photo

**Author's Note:**

> oh my GOSH Y'ALL SURPRISE I DID THE HANKCON RBB with @sloormp on twitter and it was a lot of fun to do! Enjoy!

“Dad, dad!”

Hank heard the pitter-patter of little android feet from the hallway. He didn’t bother getting up, feeling much too comfortable with Connor resting against his side. It had been a long week at the office, and even though it was a Friday night, it was too much of a bother to do anything other than lounging around.  
  
Hell, even a year ago Hank would be out drowning his sorrows on a Friday night. He doesn’t mind this “new normal.” And it all changed because of the little android that was now standing in front of him. “Look what I found!” 

“Whatcha got, Lob?” Hank asked his daughter. His eyes adjusted to what she was holding. It was his old photo album, probably from the late 80s. “Oh my god, where did you find this?” Hank held out his hands to take it from her. He blew off the dust. “No seriously, where did you find this?” He wasn’t mad, but...if _ Connor _ had found this, Hank would have told him to put it back.

“I was looking around in the garage,” Lobelia smiled, her chassis shining in the glow of the muted TV. “Could we go through it?” She hits him with those eyes, as large as a couple of saucers. It reminded Hank of when he first met Lob.

\--

_ “Okay, search the fuckin’ house. The deviant couldn’t have gone far.” Hank rubbed at his temples, his hangover drilling into his brain. His partner, Connor, called him in the middle of the night on another deviant case. Some android killed a couple in a house in the suburbs of Detroit. The android was a male housekeeper, an AX400. That was all they had to go off of thus far. _

_ “I’ll take the upstairs!” Connor called out, too excited for Hank’s taste. He was some wet-behind-the-ears kind of detective. He got on Hank’s nerves something awful sometimes, but he was good at his job. If only he were good at keeping his voice down. _

_ Hank stayed around the living room area, double checking anything that the forensics team missed. He slipped on some gloves, opening end tables, checking under furniture, but nothing was really jumping out to him. _  
  
_ And then, he heard a small thump. He wasn’t sure how he heard it amongst all the commotion, but looking back it was like he needed to hear it. The sound came from the coat closet under the stairs. _

_ Hank drew his weapon, stepping over to the door quietly. His hand tensed around the door handle and he swung the door open. _

_ Instead of a murderous deviant, he found a shivering little child in the very corner of the closet. She gave him a panicked look, her eyes welling with tears. He reminded her of--of-- _

_ Hank quickly put away his gun. “Hey, hey, it’s okay, everything’s gonna be okay.” _

_ The little android nodded, sniffling. Her LED changed from yellow to blue as she gripped Hank into a hug. Hank gently patted her back, a little shocked. He wanted to pick her up and hold her closely, to protect her from all of this. _

_ “Lieutenant!” Connor called out from upstairs. “Come quick!” He must have found something pretty important. _

_ The girl let go of Hank. He could hear her pleading not to go. “Listen. Just--just wait here, okay? I’ll come back for you, I promise.” He got out of the coat closet and looked around. Luckily there wasn’t anyone there to catch what he was saying besides the android. “But you have to stay quiet. You understand?” _

_ She nodded again, tears rolling down her eyes. Hank reached down and placed a hand on her synthetic blonde hair. “It’ll be okay.” _

_ Hank closed the door, taking one last look at the girl curled up in the corner. “Lieutenant!” Connor called right beside him. _  
  
_ “Jesus Christ, Connor! You can’t keep doing that!”_

“Sorry, Lieutenant.”

“And stop calling me that.” Hank sighed. His headache was back tenfold. “Just call me Hank. What is it?”

“Oh, uh--” Connor glanced upstairs. “I found the deviant. He’s in police custody now.”

Hank blinked a few times in surprise. How long was he in the coat closet?!

“Well--well good work, Stern.”

Connor smiled, flattered by the praise. “Did you find anything down here?” 

Hank rested against the door. “Nah, let’s go back to the station. We’re done here.”

\--

Connor laughed at the first picture on the page. It was Hank as a little baby, lying in his crib. His little tummy was sticking out of his shirt. “Hank! You were such a cute baby!” Connor wrapped an arm around Hank’s shoulder, giving it a squeeze.

“Yeah, I was.” Hank smiled. “Always had a gut from day one.” 

“It’s a _ cute _ belly.” Connor countered. 

Lob turned the page. A picture of Hank as a toddler, crying while on Santa’s lap. 

“I was also a little shit, too.”

“Hey!” Lob said in unison with Connor. “Language!”

“Sorry, sorry.” Hank laughed. “I was a brat. My mother was a saint. And my father--well, he was there too. Sometimes.”

They kept flipping through the pages, seeing pictures of Hank as he got older. School pictures, birthdays, extra-curriculars--

Lob paused at a professionally-taken family photo in the middle of the book. Hank and his parents were all dressed in goofy sweaters, all looking slightly to the left. “What are you looking at?” She asked.  
  
“Well, that’s just where the photographer told us to look.”

Lob furrowed her brows. “Why?”

Hank shrugged. “That’s just what they did back then.”

“...Why?”

Hank sighed. He hated when she got in a loop like this. He shot Connor a look to answer it for her. 

“I think the photographer thought that was the best angle.” Connor reasoned. “Especially in this lighting.”

She seemed satisfied with that answer. For now. She continued to look at the picture.

“Can we take pictures like that?” 

Hank scoffed. “What, like in dramatic lighting and dumb sweaters?”

“No, like--like in a fancy studio with a fancy photographer.”

“I wouldn’t have called him _ fancy _ \--” Hank muttered. 

“Well, I’m not sure they even have photography studios like that any more. They weren’t really a thing when I was your age.”

Lobelia pouted. “Please?” 

Hank and Connor looked at each other, waiting for who was going to break first. 

A pause. 

“We’ll see what we can do, okay sweetie?” Hank asked, kissing her shiny head. “It’s getting to be your bedtime!” 

“Could Connor read me a bedtime story?”

“Lobelia, you can call me ‘dad.’ You don’t have to call me Connor all the time.”

“I can’t call you dad, because dad is dad! You’re Connor!” 

Connor sighed. He moved into the house _ months _ ago on top of being a constant in Hank and Lobelia’s life together. But, he knew things like this took time. “Okay, go off to bed and I’ll pick out something _ really _good.”

She hopped off the couch and ran down the hall, jumping into her newly-built bedroom. Before then she was sleeping on the couch. It was nice to get all the kid’s stuff out of the living room.

Connor got up to go to the bookshelf, but Hank grabbed his hand before he went any further. “What?”

“Connor, you know shit like this takes time.” He said lowly, trying to soothe Connor’s frustration.

“I know, Hank. I just--”

“It’ll happen. Trust me. Took her a while to call me ‘dad’ as well.”

“Yeah.” Connor sighed. Hank kissed his hand before letting him go to the bookshelf. Connor decided on _ Goodnight Moon _. 

\--

_ Hank wasn’t answering his phone. _  
  
_ It didn’t surprise Connor much, just that the situation was pretty fucking urgent. A murder happened at a sex club downtown. It’s suspected another deviant was the killer. Without thinking, he hopped in a taxi over to his house. _

_ Hank’s car was parked haphazardly, barely in the confines of his driveway. Connor made a note of all the bottles by his mailbox and grimaced. He knew there was some demons he was battling, but he wasn’t quite sure exactly what they were. _  
  
_ Connor knocked on the door. “Lieutenant Anderson! It’s Connor!” He shouted, feeling kind of foolish. Pounding on the door like a desperate ex. Not that--not that he was anything of the sort--_

_ He knocked a few more times, then resorted to ringing the doorbell. He let it ring for a second or two, paused, and let it ring for ten seconds. _

_ “Jesus Fuckin--” Hank swore on the other side. He opened the door, but kept the chain on it, only allowing Connor to get a glimpse of the inside. “What is it?!” _

_ “You--Lieutenant, you weren’t answering your phone.” He tried to see over Hank’s shoulder, but no avail. “I figured the next thing would--” _

_ “What, to come pounding at my door and ringing my doorbell until I get a fuckin’ migraine?!” _

_ “...I need you.” _

_ Hank’s eyes grew wide, but then he laughed. “Connor, I’m flattered, but--” _

_ “No, no! I mean--I mean I need you for this case. Another murder was reported at--” Connor stopped talking, looking over his shoulder to find a small child riding his dog (Sumo, was it?) like a horse. “I...didn’t know you had a daughter.” _

_ “ What?! ” Hank spun around, kicking the door closed with his foot. Connor heard a lot of hushed speaking and footsteps. A moment later, the door opened again. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” _

_ Connor made an unimpressed face. “Hank. I graduated at the top of my class at the Academy. You can’t expect me to--” _

_ “Thanks for the reminder of your brilliance , but that’s not gonna fucking--” _

_ “ Who is she, Hank ?” Connor asked in a stern tone. _

_ Hank huffed out a sigh. He wasn’t expecting Connor to be so insistent to come over in the first place. “Connor...can you keep a secret?” _

_ “It…it depends on the secret, Hank.” _

_ Hank unlatched the chain from the door, letting Connor inside. “Remember that murder in that house a week ago?” _

_ “Of course I do,” Connor answered warily. “Why?” _

_ “Lob, you can come out now, sweetie.” _

_ “Her name is Lob?! ” _

_ “Lob, Lobe, Lobelia. Take your pick.” _

_ A small child snuck out from Hank’s bedroom. She looked scared, hiding behind her blonde hair. _

_ “I found her in the coat closet. She was terrified , Connor.” _

_ Connor took a look at her temple. An LED. “She’s an--” _

_ “An android.” Hank finished for him. “Now do you see why I couldn’t leave her there?” _

_“Wait. You said she seemed scared when you found her. But androids don’t--”_  
  
_ Hank gave him a pointed look, waiting for him to connect the dots._

_ It dawned on his face. “...Lieutenant!” _

_ “Oh, spare me the lecture. You gonna turn me in?” _

_ “I don’t--I don’t think so!” He seemed flustered by all of this. “I just--this is all a lot to take in. She’s--” _

_ “ Innocent in all of this, yes I’m aware.” Hank incorrectly finished Connor’s sentence, not wanting to know his view of things. _

_ Connor was at a loss for words. He looked at Hank, then down at the android child hiding behind Hank. After a long moment, he crouched down. “Lobelia, right?” _

_She nodded. _  
  
_ “Okay. Okay.” He stalled for what to say. “I’m not going to turn you in.”_

_ Hank scoffed. “Well ain’t that a faint promise.” _

_ He looked up at Hank, and then back at Lob. “You’re going to be safe here with Hank.” _

_ “There ya go.” Hank patted Connor on the shoulder. His touch seemed to linger for a few seconds. _

_ “Thank you,” Lobelia whispered. “...Do I have to stay out here?” _

_ Hank laughed. “No, no. You can go back to Sumo.” _

_ Her LED shifted to blue as she gave Hank a slight smile. Without a second longer, she turned around and ran back down the hallway. _

_ “Well.” Connor said, clearing his throat. _

_ “Yeah.” A pause. He was desperate to get out of this conversation. “You said there was a murder?” _

_ Connor turned his attention back to work. “Yes, it was at The Eden Club, a sss--” He looked around to see if Lob was around. “A sex club.” He whispered. _

_ Hank smirked. “Was there, now? Or is that some kind of excuse to take me there?” _

_ Connor gasped slightly, cheeks turning pink. “Lieutenant! I would never step outside my boundaries to even give the suggestion-- ” _

_ “Re- lax , Connor. I’m assuming it has to do with the deviant case?” _

_ “It seems to look that way.” _

_ “All right, I’ll get my coat.” He fished around his pockets and pulled out his car keys. “Get the car warmed up for me, will ya? I gotta tell Lobe that I have to leave for a while.” He tossed the keys over to Connor, who barely caught them. _

_ “Ah--yes sir!” _

\--

“You want us to do _ what _ for you?” Connor’s younger brother Niles asked him. They met up at a cafe right in the heart of the city.  
  
“I want you to check with your photographer friends and see if there’s someone who still does those mall photos.”

Niles cocked an eyebrow, stirring his black coffee. A needless motion, but it helped him think. Connor lost count of how many times his brother woke him up from scraping his spoon around his mug when he was pulling all nighters back in school. Now it’s almost kind of a fond memory. “‘_ Mall photos?’ _” 

The youngest of the Stern brothers, Conrad, jumped in to expound. “Aren’t they those pictures where families wear those ugly sweaters and go--” Conrad turned his face to the side, smiling a goofy smile. Connor had never seen him smile that wide. It was unsettling. “--Like this?”

Niles seemed unimpressed by the idea. “Why would you even want something like that? Those were out of style even when _ we _were kids.”

Connor sipped his iced coffee. He put too much sugar in it, as usual. Maybe the ice will dilute the sweetness. “Hank’s daughter wants family photos.”

Conrad scoffed. “Well, it’s not like she’s going to change that much over time.” When Connor first told his brothers he was dating Hank, they didn’t exactly approve. Especially considering the circumstances. Despite their feelings, the two brothers did their fair share of helping during the revolution. Conrad especially. It was maybe the one time Connor saw some semblance of humanity in his actions.  
  
“Yeah, but Hank and I are.” Connor said, trying _ desperately _ not to think of that statement and the implications. “And she’s never had pictures taken of her.”

“Not even school pictures?” Niles asked, stopping his stirring to take a sip. 

Connor shook his head. “No, although she will be attending an integrated school in the fall.”

“Will she look like an egghead, or will she look like human?” Conrad asked, mostly just being a jerk.

“She’ll look however she wants to look.” Connor beamed. He was so proud of her insistence on not feeling the need to put on her skin projection, even when they were out in public. Post-revolution, more and more androids were defying the expectations of looking human. It warmed Connor to see the world change for the better. 

Niles thought for a moment. “I’ll have to check with my former classmates. I’m sure one of them is doing a _ throwback _ style mall photo series.”

Conrad smirked at Niles across the table. “I’ll help as well.”  
  
Connor seemed to miss the tone of his brother’s voice, but he smiled at the two of them. “Thank you!” He took another sip of his coffee. “Augh, why do I always get coffee with three sugars!” 

Niles rolled his eyes. “We’ve been trying to help you on that since _ college _.

“You’re just too stubborn to listen!”

Connor shook his plastic cup, shaking the watery coffee and the ice around. “Next time, I’ll only ask for two sugars, I swear!”

Conrad rolled his eyes. “You say that _ every _time, bro.”

\--

_ “You’ve been cagey lately, Connor.” Niles stated. _

_ “What? I am how I always am!” _

_ Smirking, he raised his eyebrows and said, “Right. Okay.” You haven’t talked about your job, and that’s always the first thing you talk about when you come over. Actually, it’s maybe the _ only _ thing you talk about. Unless something is going on in your dating life--” _

_ “No! No, no, no. Everything is fine. Everything is _ normal _ .” _  
_  
_ _ “There is nothing that could be _less normal than you saying everything is normal.” Niles got up to go to the kitchen to get a glass of water. “Do you want anything, my absolutely normal brother?”

_ Connor didn’t respond. Niles scoffed and went back into the room, sipping at his glass of water. Connor was staring with rapt attention at his phone. “What is it?” _

_ “I--I need to go. I’m sorry--” Connor grabbed his coat, haphazardly tugging it over his gangly arms. “We’ll talk later!” _

_ “Right.” Niles said into his water glass. _

_ \- _

_ Connor fumbled with his phone as he read the text from Hank over and over again: _

_FEDS ON DEVIANT CASE. NEED TO KEEP LOB SAFE._

_ “Shit, shit--” Connor huffed out. He booked it to the nearest subway station. _

_ He heard the screech of tires behind him. Either it was the FBI coming to get him, or it was Niles. Either way, Connor stopped in his tracks, turned around, and sighed. It was Niles in his fancy car. _

_ “You wanna tell me what’s going on?” Niles shouted. Unlocking his doors, he gave Connor a stare that made him almost wish it was the FBI. Niles could get so intimidating with his icy blue eyes. It made it impossible for Connor to lie to him. _

_ Connor panted, looking at Niles and looking at the subway signs. He got in the car. _  
  
_ “Could you get to this place--” Connor typed out Hank’s street name and showed it to Niles. “As quickly as possible?”_

_ “That’s thirty minutes away, even with good traffic.” _

Connor bit the inside of his cheek. “I know.” 

Niles smirked again. “You better buckle up. We’re going to get there in twenty.”

He sped off without giving Connor enough time to get buckled in. 

_ \-- _

“I have some good news, Lobelia!” Connor said when he got back home from the cafe. He was a little jittery, but he tried to pass it off as excitement. Hank looked up from his phone and saw his shaking hands and smirked a little. He knew where he was.

Lob looked up from her coloring book. She was coloring perfectly inside the lines. It was a picture of a kitty. “What is it?”

“My brothers--” And it killed him not to say ‘your uncles,’ but baby steps-- “are going to find a photographer so we can take those family photos!”

“_Ohmygosh_!” Lob said all in one breath. She jumped up from the floor. “With the sweaters and everything?!”

Connor nodded, a smile growing on his face.

“Dad, dad, did you hear that?!” 

Hank laughed. “Yes I did, sweetie.”

“Thank you Connor, thank you thank you!” She yelled, running to hug Connor tightly. It was the first hug she gave him. Connor felt like the air was being squeezed out of him. She gasped and let go of him. “I got to pick out an outfit!” And like a blur, she was out of the living room.  
  
Hank put his phone in his pocket. “You think your brothers will really _ find _ someone that’ll do this?”

Connor shrugged. “Niles has all sorts of weird connections.”

\--

_ “Hi Connor--who the fuck is this?!” _

_ “Hank, this is my brother, Niles. I debriefed him on the way over.” Connor said professionally, acting like he didn’t spend the last twenty-something minutes yelling at Niles about driving but also giving information about Hank, Lobelia, deviants, and the FBI. It was a productive drive. Connor wished he had ten extra minutes to let his heart rate go down. _

_ “‘Debrief’--you mean you told him a secret that could jeopardize everything!” _

_ “Hardly the case.” Niles said. “Can we come in?” _

_ Hank sighed, moving away from the door to let them inside. _

_ “Where’s the android?” _

_ “Lobelia!” Connor called out as if she were lost. Her pure white head peeked up from beyond the hallway. “Hank! Where’s her skin?! What happened?!” _

_ “Good lord, would you relax? She can turn it back on if she needs to.” _

_ “I like it this way.” Lob said defiantly. She had seen Connor a couple of times since, so she wasn’t afraid of him. Niles was almost identical to Connor, so she folded her arms. She was wearing a blue sweater, a little big for her. Connor wondered if Hank bought that for her, or-- _

_ “Okay, Connor’s brother, what can you do to help? What’s so fuckin’--” _

_ “Hey!” Lob said, a little annoyed. _  
  
_ Hank sighed. “What’s so important about you that Connor had to blab my secret to you?”_

_ “It’s our secret--” Connor muttered, barely loud enough for even Lob to hear it. _  
  
_ “I know a few programmers.” Niles adjusted the sleeves on his turtleneck with all the casualness as talking about the weather. “Robotics majors, although they didn’t want to be a corporate shill to CyberLife.”_

_ Hank cocked a brow. “Go on.” _

_ “I’m saying that if the Feds close in on you, that you’re helping out a deviant--” _

_ “Woah, woah, woah, Niles. I didn’t tell you Lob was a deviant.” _

_ Niles gave Connor a sidelong glance. “You just did.” _

_ Hank glowered. “How can your friends help her?” _

_ “Well, for starters they could take out her LED. And then give her fingerprints. Connor told me androids don’t have them. That would be the easiest way to get them off your scent.” _

_ Lobelia looked at her fingers. Completely lineless. _

_ Hank sighed and looked at Connor. “I don’t know if we have any other choice.” _  
  
_ “It’s either that, or have someone take her out of the city. But that might be even more dangerous--”_

_ “No!” Lob said, grabbing Hank’s hand for comfort. Hank gave it a squeeze. _  
  
_ “And how do you know all this stuff? You didn’t say you were a programmer.”_

_ Niles smirked, always a half step ahead of everything. “Because our brother is one.” _

_ “Great, a third Stern brother. Just what the world needs.” Hank looked down at Lobelia, who looked back at him with big worried eyes. “Hey, Lob, I think Sumo needs a story read to him, okay sweetie?” _

_ Shrinking away from the conversation, Lob disappeared down the hallway. All the men could hear was a soft “boof” from Sumo. _

_ “Let me call Conrad.” Connor said, typing out his number on his phone. _

_ \-- _

That night, Connor got a text from Niles. He read it out to Hank. “‘Here’s my friend Jeremy’s number. For some reason he’s into the ‘mall photo’ aesthetic as well.’ Oh, he sent a picture as well.” Connor guffawed at the picture, then showed it to Hank. He was exactly the kind of guy to be into this kind of barely-nostalgic trend. A ponytail, a goatee, horn-rimmed glasses, and a turtleneck. “He looks like every guy I was into when I was in my early twenties.”

Hank laughed at the picture, then caught himself. “_ HA! _ Wait, what changed?”

“I met you.” Connor said sweetly, slipping under the covers. He kissed Hank on the cheek. 

Hank wasn’t convinced. “Yeah, but that still accounts for some time in-between.”

“...Growing pains.” Connor offered. This seemed to be a topic he’d have to bring up later.

“O-kay. Are you going to schedule an appointment with him?”  
  
“Yeah, but I’ll do it tomorrow. It’s a little too late.” He set his phone on the end table. “I wouldn’t want him to think I’m trying to message him for something else.”

“Something you’re familiar with?”

Connor scoffed. “_Hank_!” Hank crowded his side of the bed, enveloping him in a hug.  
  
“You love me.” Hank said in a warm tone, rubbing his beard against Connor’s smooth face.  
  
“I do! That’s what makes you impossible!” Connor laughed.

After pressing some kisses against Connor’s temple, he shut off the light. 

\--

_ “Will this hurt?” Lob asked worriedly. Her fingertips spread over a panel. The android revolution was ramping up, with humans taking more extreme measures. Better safe than sorry. They were at Conrad’s dingy studio apartment, the one window in there taped over with garbage bags. Connor sighed at the sight; he had more than his fair share of curtains to give to his brother, but he never took the offer. Conrad insisted these worked just as well. It’s amazing they were even related. _  
  
_ “No, sweetheart, of course not.” Hank placated, patting her head. He looked over at Conrad, tinkering away at his keyboard, the brightness of his screen fully turned up. He wept for his eyesight._

_ “Just, about --” Conrad did one more keystroke. “There. Okay, android child, keep your hands face up on the mat.” _

_ “My name’s Lobelia!” She answered in an annoyed tone. _

_ Conrad swatted his hand in the air. He was still looking at his screen. “Yeah, yeah, whatever. Keep them there, okay?” _

_ “Okay…” She answered quietly. _

_ Hank leaned over to Connor. “So uh, what’s he doing?” _

_ Connor turned his head and whispered against Hank’s ear. He could smell his cologne. It swirled around in his head, clouding his brain. His answer was less-than-articulate: “Computer stuff with a laser.” _

_ Scoffing, Hank said, “Oh that clears it up.” _

_ Conrad cleared his throat. “If you insist on knowing, I’m going to launch a program to delicately carve a unique set of fingerprints for your child.” _

_ “Well, she’s not--” Hank started, then caught Lob’s eyes. “She’s--” He trailed off, not knowing how to explain. _

_ “I’m going to start the procedure,” Conrad announced, sounding slightly like a mad scientist. “Goggles on!” _

_ “We don’t have any--” Connor said, then he shielded his face. _  
  
_ “I’m just joking, bro!” Conrad laughed. “But seriously, don’t look at it.”_

_ “Noted.” Hank turned around, only seeing the red glow and the hissing sound of the laser. _

_ Connor also turned around, plugging his ears and keeping his eyes shut. Hank peeked at Connor through his peripheral, laughing slightly. _

_ “Almost done!” Conrad yelled over the noise. Lobelia couldn’t look more bored. Less than a minute later, the noise stopped. Conrad looked at his handiwork, no pun intended, and smiled. “There, a new set of fingerprints!” _

_“How do you feel, sweetie?” Hank asked, coming over to look at the work. It looked pretty much like...well, like fingerprints._  
  
_ She curled her fingers inwards, forming weak fists. “Will this make me a human?” _  
  
_ Connor jumped in, “No, but you’ll be able to pass a fingerprint test if it comes to that--” He looked at his brother. “Right?”_

_ “Oh yeah , don’t worry.” Conrad seemed sure of himself, quelling everyone’s fears for the time being. “We also should probably remove her LED as well.”_

_ Lob looked up from her hands. “Okay.” _

_ \-- _

Connor arranged for the photo session to take place next Saturday. Lobelia cycled through all different ideas for outfits and props. She ran a couple by Hank and Connor. “Maybe Dad is a big scary dragon, and Connor is the princess, and I’m a knight!”

“Why do I have to be--” Connor and Hank both started, then they took a second to appreciate their child challenging gender norms.  
  
“Or maybe we could take a picture where I’m a cowboy, and Sumo is a horsie!”  
  
Hank laughed. “I don’t think we’ll be allowed to have Sumo with us.”

“Why not?”

“Cause he’ll take massive sh--” Hank caught himself in the nick of time. “He’ll make a mess, Lob. You’ve seen how he is around here, and he _ lives _ here!”

Lob frowned and looked over at Sumo. “I understand.”

“Have you picked out what you want to wear, Lobe?” Connor asked, trying to distract her from the disappointment of not bringing Sumo with them. 

She gasped and hurried off to her room. The shifting of clothing and rattling of hangers. Footsteps back to the living room. “I’m going to wear this!” It was a ruffled grey sweater dress. Connor looked at it for a moment, not recognizing it. Hank smiled, knowing exactly why she chose it.

It was the first article of clothing he bought for her. 

\--

_ Hank held on tightly to Lobelia’s hand as they crossed the street to go to the mall. A few days after getting her fingerprints and LED removed, the FBI only cracked down on finding deviants. More and more were joining the resistance. Hank feared they’d visit him next, but he remained calm for Lob. _  
_  
_ _ He figured she’d have to wear more _ normal _ clothes to present as a regular child. No more wearing the clothes he found her in or the very ( _very) old shirts of Hank’s that she swam in. He didn’t want to put her in Cole’s clothes, mostly because that would be a new can of worms for him to explain to her. He didn’t want her to worry about her importance in his life. That she’s her own person - or, well, android.

_ “‘Belia, you can pick out whatever you like--” Hank started to say until he saw her run over to the brand new clothes “--in the clearance aisle.” _

_ She pivoted hard, running to the other end of the store. “No running!” He yelled. She stopped and went into a brisk walk. _

_ It didn’t take her long, finding something she liked. Hank couched this trip to the store mostly as a fun time, but he also knew the danger of what was going on. She saw it on a civilian’s side, and he’s sure she’s heard him talk about it with Connor on the phone. Hank barely had time to rest in one of the chairs near the dressing rooms before Lobelia came over, holding the sweater dress out in front of her. _  
_  
Hank was surprised. “You really want to go with that?”_

_ She nodded. “I like the color!” _

_ “You _ do _ ? It’s kind of--” _

_ “It reminds me of me!” _

_ It took a second, but Hank realized what she meant. The color was the same shade as the parts of her shell. The first time she didn’t have her skin projection on, she made sure to ask him, worrying that he would get scared. That he would see her as the criminals he’d been investigating. After denying again and again that he was fine, she eventually felt comfortable enough to show him how she truly looks. _  
_  
Hank saw this little child, head reflecting the sun’s rays through the window, and smiled. He held out his arms. “C’mere, you little egg--” He said. _

_ She hugged him, smiling wide. _

_ Getting out of the memory, he asked her, “Do you want to get anything else?” _

_ “No, it’s okay.” _

_ “We probably should get more than one outfit, honey--” _

_ “I looked at all of them and I just want this one!” _

_ “Well, I’m going to look just in--” _

_ “None of them are what I want!” She said a little too loudly. Hank looked around to find other parents watching. He certainly didn’t miss this feeling. _

_ “Lob--” _

_ “I want this one! I don’t want any others!” _

_ “Sweetie--” _

_ “The other clothes don’t look like _ me! _ ” She cried. Hank never thought he’d have to deal with a child _ not _ wanting more than one outfit. He wanted to get out of the store as fast as possible. _

_ “Okay, okay, Jesus--” He held out his hand. “We’ll only get this one. Let’s go and pay for it.” _

_ She wiped her tears away. This was the first time she cried around him. He was surprised she felt that strongly and that androids could cry. _

_ After paying for the dress, they rode home in silence. _

_ “I’m sorry,” Lob said quietly. She hung her head down in front of her, blonde hair cascading over her face. _  
_  
_Hank sighed. “I’m sorry I didn’t listen to you the first time. I didn’t think you would get so worked up. It’s just clothes--”

_ “It’s not just clothes.” She said, almost a whisper. _

_ “Okay, okay, I got that now. It’s okay.” _

_ “You mean it?” She asked cautiously. _

_ “‘Course I do.” _

_ Lob looked out the window, of the rapidly changing scene of downtown, protestors on both sides, fighting. She looked down at the floor, focused on the stray scraps of paper and trash in Hank’s car. _

_ \-- _

“What are you gonna wear, dad?” Lob asked, setting the dress over the armchair. 

“Not sure yet. Do you want to help Connor and I pick something out?”

Her eyes practically _ glowed _ at the question. She and Sumo went into Hank and Connor’s bedroom. For a split second, Connor feared she would go snooping and find something _ very unwelcoming_, but he remembered Hank finally invested in a small safe. Not that she couldn’t crack it, but it certainly gave them more peace of mind. 

Lobelia shoved the closet doors open, then took a step back to analyze what each of them had. On one side was a wealth of hip youthful and wacky printed shirts, and on the other side was Connor’s shirts. She folded her arms, deep in thought. Starting on Hank’s side first, she flipped through the shirts. 

“Dad, why are all your shirts so _ weird _!” 

“It’s _ fashion _, Lob.” Hank sighed. They had this conversation many times over.

Picking out the most tame print she could find, she held it up for Hank. It was a yellow gingham shirt.  
  
“What, is this for a job interview?” Hank folded his arms. 

Connor gasped slightly. “Hey, didn’t you wear that on our first date?”

“Hah, yeah, to try and give off the impression I had my shit together--”

“_ Hey! _” Lob scolded.

“_ Sorry _. To make it seem like I was put together.” He turned to face Connor, who was sitting beside him on the bed. “Guess it worked.”

Connor laughed a little. “Yeah, something like that.” He gave Hank a kiss on the cheek.

He turned to face his daughter. “But Lob, _ why _ do you want me to wear something like that?! It’s boring!”

Lob furrowed her brows. “_ I like it _.” 

Guess that was that.  
  
Turning towards Connor’s side, she swiped through a bevy of neutral colored shirts. Nary a print to be found. Opposites attract.

“Finally!” She said, pulling out the one printed shirt Connor had. At least, there was One Print on it. A small heart, placed over the left side of the teal shirt.

“Oh _ Lobe _, I haven’t worn that in ages! I doubt it even fits me any--”

“Connor, you _ know _ it fits you. You can cut the false modesty.”

“I don’t know if it does! Really! I’ve grown since then. I got that five years ago.”

“...You were 26.” 

“I--” He gesticulated toward his figure. “I--gained some _ muscle _\--”

Over Hank’s laughs, Lob placed the shirt on Connor’s lap. She seemed to be done with the playful bickering.

“Looks like we’re wearing these.” Hank announced. He tried to hide his sour expression, knowing this whole thing wasn’t exactly for him. At least he got rid of his shirts that he knew for sure didn’t fit; those shirts every person has in their closets for when they magically lose fifteen pounds. Perhaps he was projecting onto everyone. Either way, he did a deep clean of his closet recently. Sometimes things work out.

“We’ll be quite a family, huh?” Connor asked, smiling. Lob nodded back. “I’m gonna--I’m gonna try this on.”

Hank rolled his eyes. “For god’s sake Con, you _ know it will fit you _!” 

“I need to be sure!”

\--

_ There was a knock at Hank’s door. _  
  
_ It was after a long day of interrogation of the department’s police androids. There’s been talks of drastic measures, some of which sound like the president needed to open a history book. Hank got up with a groan. Before he opened the door, he looked at Lobelia. He gave her a look that said, “It’s okay, just stay calm.”_

_ He looked through the peephole. “Ah, fuck--” Hank groaned. It was Agent Perkins, the FBI agent who essentially took over Hank and Connor’s case. He opened the door, a wide smile on his face. “Perkins! For whom I owe the pleasure to?” _

_ “That would be me, Lieutenant.” He answered drolly. “Just wanted to take a look around your house. To make sure you’re not playing both sides.” _

_ Hank let him inside. “By all means.” Turns out Perkins wasn’t the only guest. There were two SWAT team members behind him, trailing his steps as if he were some celebrity. “What’s with the heat?” _

_ “They’re just here for reinforcement. In case any deviants might attack.” He looked around, hands behind his back. Almost with laser focus, he locked eyes with Lobelia. “Didn’t know you had a kid.” _

_“Yeah, she’s--” _  
  
_ “Sorry. Let me rephrase. I didn’t know you had another kid. A daughter, nonetheless.” He smirked at Hank._

_ Lobelia’s eyes darted between them. She’d been reading chapter books quietly. Something dealing with ponies. Hank picked up some more age appropriate reading material at the library earlier that week. For all he knew, she was re-reading them. _

_ Hank remained calm despite his hands forming into fists in his pockets. “Yeah, she’s my sister’s kid.” _

_ Perkins turned around. “Does your sister not know we’re on the brink of a civil war?” _

_ Hank shrugged. “She’s on a business trip.” _

_ “And you’re the most viable option. Interesting judgement.” He muttered. Hank imagined beating Perkins’ face in. “Hi there. What’s your name?” He put on a fake smile for her, feigning niceness. _

_ “Lobelia.” She sounded nervous. _  
  
_ “What’s wrong?” Perkins asked. _

_ “There’s--” Lob started, looking over at the SWAT members behind him. “I can see their guns.” _

_ Hank looked over, seeing their guns strapped to their backs. _

_ “It’s just for protection, dear. Do you feel scared about the androids protesting?” _

_ Lob looked over at Hank for guidance. He subtly nodded. _  
  
_ “Yeah, a little.”_

_ “Well, with your uncle and me out stopping the deviants, you’ll have nothing to worry about.” He gave her a pat on the shoulder, then stood. “All right, Anderson. Got to stop at your partner’s house.” _

_ “Connor’s house? Why’s that?” _

_ “Just doing some rounds.” He smiled. _

_ Hank went over to open the door again. “Okay, glad you stopped by.” He tried to say it as sincerely as he could. _

_ The three men left without another word. Hank double locked the front door and sighed. _

_ Over his shoulder, he heard Lobelia crying softly. _

_ “What is it, sweetheart?” He asked, face softening. _

_ “I--I was scared--” She said, putting her shirt sleeves to her eyes. “I thought they were gonna take me away.” _

_ Hank held her in a tight hug. “They’d have to get through me first. I would never let that happen to you.” _

_ Lob’s sobs were muffled, her face pressed into Hank’s chest. She looked up at Hank eyes still teary. “Did you have a son?” _

_ Hank sighed, eyes getting watery. “Yes. He--a few years ago--something happened--” _  
  
_ Getting what he was trying to say, she went back to her hug. “I’m sorry,” she said, voice quiet._

_ Hank rested his chin against the top of her head. He didn’t want to say “it’s okay,” because it wasn’t. He just held her, trying not to cry _

_ But, if only slightly, things were okay with Lob in his life. _

_ \-- _

“You must be Connor!” Jeremy the photographer called out, holding out his hand well before he was within an arm’s length of him. “God, you look so much like your brothers!”

“I get that a lot.” Connor said, finally getting to his hand in a firm shake. “Nice to meet you.”

“Look at this family! _ Very _ 2039! So modern.” He held out his hands, acting like he was already framing a picture. “Welcome to my studio.”

It didn’t look like the mall studios Hank remembered from when he was a kid. Not that that was a _ bad _ thing -- it mostly just meant there was less stale smells and mystery fabrics. All the hairspray and polyester of other families in the waiting rooms…

“I’m Lobelia!” She said, holding out her hand. She kept Hank and Connor up last night, unable to calm down about the “photo shoot.” As if she were a model. 

“O-kay! I’m Jeremy!” He didn’t shake her hand back. “So this is what you’re all wearing? ..._Interesting_.” He gave them a judgmental once-over.  
  
They were wearing exactly what Lob wanted them to wear. The shirt that Connor was so sure would be too small for him and his _ big muscles _ fit perfectly. Hank couldn’t help but laugh at the huffing and grunting coming from Connor when he tried it on. A lot of flexing happened, trying to stretch the seams of the shirt to show he had grown. No such luck.

“It is!” Lob answered for them. “I picked them out!”

“Well...it was certainly a _choice!_ How about you and Connor go over onto that blue X on the ground there?” He pointed to the masking tape that was right in front of the camera. Behind the set was a dark background. It reminded Connor of his school photos.

“Wait, what about me?” Hank asked, feeling a little jealous.

“You know those pictures where the dad is in an overlay in the picture? As in he’s looking to the side, almost like a noble ghost?”

“I think so?” 

“Oh c’mon. You’re old enough to remember those pictures!”

Hank puffed out his chest, standing taller. “What the fuck’s that supposed to mean?” 

“Hey!” Lob called out from the blue X. 

Jeremy gave a nervous smile. “Nothing, nothing! I’m just--that’s what we’re gonna do for your picture!”

“Where will that be?”

“Actually--hm. Connor and Lobelia, I’m gonna have Daddy Hank get his picture done first.”

“Please--please don’t call me that.” He mumbled, walking over to the blue X. 

“Okay!” Jeremy hustled over to the camera. “Daddy Hank, whenever you’re ready.” He clearly didn’t hear Hank’s plea.

“So do I just…look somewhere?”  
  
Pointing to his left, he said, “Just look over here, past the light.” _ Click. Click. _“Beautiful! I think we’re done with that.”

“Wait, that’s--that’s it? You don’t want any more?”

Jeremy shook his head, looking at the screen on his camera. “Nope, you’re a natural!”

Perplexed, Hank walked off the blue X. Was this how they do it now? Was there a shortage of _ digital _ film that photographers could only use two files?!

Connor and Lob stepped up to the set. 

“Connor, just a _ little _ to the right. Little more. Little more. _ Stop!” _ Jeremy squinted. “Okay, go back a little.” 

After a minute of meticulous Connor Moving, Jeremy started taking photos. “Okay, Lobelia, you want to wear your skin?”

“This is my skin.” She said.

“No, I mean your human--”

“She’s _ fine how she is _!” Hank yelled out from one of the director-style chairs. Lob smiled.

“Okay, it’s just gonna--you’re leaving a lot of glare--” He hurried to turn down the lights. 

Connor and Lob stood there, motionless, holding hands. Lob could feel Connor’s hands starting to sweat. It wasn’t a good sign; his palms always got sweaty when he got nervous. 

Going back over to the camera, Jeremy was in position again. “Okay, Connor, move slightly to the right.”

“I didn’t move--” Connor started to say, then sighed when he saw Jeremy’s hand shoo him over. 

_ Click. Click. _ “Try one where you have _ big smiles _!” He even motioned a big smile with his index fingers at the corner of his mouth.

They both smile. _ Click. Click. Click. _

“Smile more!” 

_ Click _. 

“More!” 

_ Click click click. _

“Connor, please smile more!”

If Connor smiled any wider his cheeks would split open, but he tried. He wasn’t a quitter.

“Now put your hand on Lob’s head.”

“What?” Connor asked through his plastered on smile.  
  
“You know, like--” Jeremy rested his arms out on an invisible Lob. “Casual.”

Connor stopped smiling. “I don’t want Lob to feel like a prop.”

“Okay, fine. How about we have you hold her?”

“She’s--Jeremy--she’s heavy--”

Jeremy rolled his eyes. “I’m sure Hank could pick her up with no problem.”

“He probably could, but I’m not him.” Connor said, a little bit of acid in his tone. 

Jeremy sighed. “How about…” He thought for a moment. Grabbing his remote clicker to take photos, he walked over to the side of the set. “Look at me Connor. Lobelia.” He snapped his fingers. Connor’s hands got more sweaty.

_ Click. Click. _ “Smile wide again!”

More smiles, more clicks. “C’mon, act like you love each other!”

“We do!” He said through his smile. “I’m holding her hand!”

"Well act like it _more_!" He said. _Click. Click._ "You too, Egghead!"

Connor stopped smiling. "What did you say?"

Jeremy rolled his eyes. "Oh _relax_, Connor." He motioned to Lob, who was staring over at Hank unamused. "Lob, quit looking over at your grandpa!"

"Hey!" Connor said.  
  
"Okay, okay, fine, back to smiling!" _Click. Click. _"Eggy! Over here, darling!"

"Stop calling her that!" Connor snapped. "Her name is _Lobelia_! She is her _own person!_" Connor's voice started to shake a little, pointing aggressively at the photographer. 

"Oh my _god_, keep your circa 2017 emo-revival shirt on. You need to _relax_! Your goofy locks of hair are getting out of place."

Connor gasped, holding a hand over his errant lock of hair that was drooping down his forehead. "They are _not--"_

"Leave my dad _alone_!" Lobelia shouted, stepping in front of Connor to guard him. Her LED was glowing read. _Click. Click._

"Ah, _there we go_! There's the love! The genuine emotion!" He looked up at Connor. "Connor, do you need a minute?"

"_Yes, several!_" He said, walking over to Hank. "Hank-did--did you _hear _what he said to me?!"

Hank gave him a soft pat on the back. Even though he was thinking, "Calm down, Con," his voice said, "I know, I know. Do you wanna go?"

Lobelia followed over to her family. "Are you okay?" She asked Connor.   
  
"Yeah," he sighed. "Yeah, I'm fine." He was not fine.

"We can go." Hank said calmly, patting Connor's back.

"Hey, Egghead and family, you're wanted back on set!"

"Stop _calling her that_!" Hank and Connor both yelled, grabbing Lob's hand and storming out of the studio. 

-

When they got to Hank’s beat up car, Connor was just starting to wipe away his tears. “Hey, are you okay?”

“I just--I don’t know why he was _like that_.” Connor said, voice uneasy. 

“Cause he’s a dick, Connor. For all we know, it could’ve been one of Conrad’s asshole friends--”

“_Conrad_,” he whispered. “I have to make a couple of calls to my _ loving brothers._” He pulled out his phone, going to Conrad’s number.

While Connor was getting to the bottom of the weird situation they just had, Hank looked at Lob in the rearview mirror. “Sorry things didn’t go as planned, Lob.”

“It’s okay,” she sighed.  
  
“Hey, if the pictures don’t look right, we can just try to have a set up in our home, okay?”

“You mean it?!”

“Course I do, pumpkin!”

Seeming satisfied, Lob looked out the window with a smile on her face.

“I should have known.” Connor said, putting away his phone. “Conrad was up to his old tricks again.”

“Seems like one of the more tamer tricks, at least from what you told me--”

“I should have known! He used Niles as a front, saying it was his friend. Niles has pretentious friends, but Conrad--”

“Has _ mean _ friends!” Lob shouted. 

“Yes he does!” Connor agreed. “Although one silver lining of all this.”

“What’s that?” Hank asked. 

Connor glanced in the back seat, smiling. “Lob called me her _ dad _!” 

“Because you are my dad! And dad is my dad!”

Hank chuckled softly. Connor placed his hands over the heart on his shirt (as well as his real heart). 

\--

_ The revolution ended peacefully. All talks of mass execution of androids were dismissed in an instant. The leader of the movement, Markus, gave a rousing speech that Lob managed to catch on one of the TVs at home. Hank stayed in that night, fearing the worst. He got written up for it by Captain Fowler for not working, but he didn’t care. _

_ Lob jumped up. “Does this mean--?!” _

_ Hank searched his wallet, finding her LED ring. “It does.” _

_ “Ahh!” She squealed, grabbing the ring. “I think we’ll have to go back to Conrad’s house to put it back on.” _

_ “Oh, I’m sure there’s a way to do it here. Without Conrad.” Hank wondered if he took house calls. “Maybe you could research how to put it on?” _

_ “Maybe.” Her eyelids fluttered, doing some quick research. “I think you could do it!” _

_ Hank leaned forward in his chair. “Maybe you could also research ‘adoption?’” _

_ Lob’s eyes grew wide. She hopped up and sprung into Hank’s arms. “Really?!” _

_ “Absolutely.” Hank kissed her temple, right where her LED would be. _

_ \- _

_ Later in the night, after Lob went into sleep mode, Hank called Connor. He was definitely still working, not having the cushy tenure at the station that Hank had. _

_ After the first ringtone, he picked up. “Hello, Lieutenant. Is everything all right?” He sounded worried. _

_ “Of course, of course. Things have never been better.” _

_ “I’m happy to hear that.” _

_ “I was just calling, just--do you maybe, possibly, want to go out for drinks sometime?” _

_ A pause. “When you say _ drinks _ …” _

_ “Of the non-alcoholic variety, I mean. Or, at least very nearly non-alcoholic.” _

_ “Sure, we could talk about the cases, maybe get some paperwork done--” Hank couldn’t tell if Connor was just still in Work Mode or if he was being incredibly obtuse. _

_ “Connor. I mean off-hours.” _

_ “... _ Oh _ !” Guess it was the former. “Yes, I would--that would be great, I--yes! When?” _

_ Hank laughed at his flustered tone. “Maybe when things in the precinct settle down a bit?” _

_ “I--okay, yes, that makes sense. I can’t wait.” _

_ “Me neither. I just thought I’d ask.” _

_ “I’m glad you did.” _

_ Hank smiled. “Okay, I’ll let you get back to it, then.” _

_ “Good night, Hank.” He replied warmly. _

_ \-- _

_ \-- _

_ A few months later... _

“It’s here! It’s here!” Lob yelled when she got back inside. “The pictures!”

Hank huffed. “It’s about freaking time.” He was still getting used to the “not swearing” rule Lob enforced with an iron fist. “I can’t believe he was even a real photographer.”

“Me neither!” Connor called out over the sound of frantic package ripping from Lobelia. She pulled out a navy blue book, relatively thin. Full of proofs for ordering. Lob handed the book to Hank.

When he opened the book, a note fell out. He read it out loud. “‘Hank, Connor, and Lobelia: I’m sorry for the person I was playing when you were there. Conrad put me up to it for a few hundred bucks. It was too hard to turn down. He also paid for the photos after hearing about how upset you all were. Maybe I just played the part too well.  
  
Anyway, whatever you order is free of charge.  
  
Please don’t leave a bad review on my site if you haven’t already.

  * Jeremy.’”

“...Huh.” Connor thought. “This plan is...even less Conrad-like.”

“Well, I’m sure Niles is doing some damage control as well.”

“Mm. Fair point.”

“Let’s look at the pictures!” Lob squeezed in between them and flipped through the book. The photos quickly went from happy, to _ too _ happy, to annoyed, to spiraling, to yelling. And crying. Lob laughed at the picture where Connor finally lashed out at Jeremy. They could practically hear Connor yelling in the picture. “I want this one!”

“Really?!” Connor asked in tandem with Hank. “Why?!”

“Because it’s funny! And it is the most like our family!” She said between giggles. “Look at my face!” 

Hank and Connor looked at each other. Lob’s choice, you can’t back out of it. “Okay, looks like we’ll order this one.”

“Can we keep the book too?”

“Mmm, I don’t know if they’ll let us.”

“Well can I keep it until the picture gets here?”

“Sure, why not?” Hank shrugged.

Lob got up from the couch, book tucked under her arm. “Sumo!” She called out. “I gotta show you the pictures!”

Hank and Connor laughed, then Hank put his left arm around Connor. As Connor spun Hank’s engagement ring, he asked, “We’re not going to hang that up on the mantle, are we?”

“Fuck no, I’m getting the first one--”

“Hey!” Lob called out. “No swearing!”

The two of them laughed, both unable to believe that this was their life now. The new, wonderful, amazing normal.


End file.
